Real Women, Real Talk – Hormonal Health and Menopause

Real Women, Real Talk: Hormonal Health and Menopause

Wendy Dodds:
I think a lot of women just wanna be able to hear from other women in a kind of a in a world where it’s just inundated with information. Yeah. They just want some real talk.

Kate Beere:
What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I lose the belly weight that I used to be able to you know, if I ate right and exercised, I could lose? Why is my skin sagging? Why is my why are there so many wrinkles happening? Why do I feel like crap? Why can’t I fix it? What is wrong with me that I can’t power through this?

Wendy Dodds:
Being the catalyst of change and being the person in your circle Yeah. Who is open and willing to talk about, because a lot of times in anything, we just wait for somebody to go first.

Kate Beere:
Hi, everyone. Thanks for joining us today on a pretty exciting episode where we’re gonna be talking about hormonal health and menopause, and this is our 2nd episode in our series that Wendy and I are doing on Real Women, Real Talk. And this is where we talk about important issues that women often have sort of, I would say, like, dinner time conversations about or don’t actually talk about, and so we’re bringing those, to the podcast. Wine conversations. Wine conversations.

Wendy Dodds:
Though. So Yeah.

Kate Beere:
Yeah. It is water. I swear. It’s still a little early. It’s still a little early over here. And I think what I’m excited about is for us to share our own personal stories, and that’s what we do a lot on the show is sort of give our perspective and our journey in hopes that it can maybe help other people. Yeah. I do wanna just set the stage on this one a little bit about because we’re gonna talk about things that have worked for us around hormonal health, which is often tied to, you know, medications, supplements, regimens, and we’re not medical professionals.

Kate Beere:
Professionals is a better word than people.

Wendy Dodds:
This is

Kate Beere:
a good this is about

Wendy Dodds:
our journey. But I think it’s I think, you set that stage really well because I think in for this particular topic, I think a lot of women just wanna be able to hear from other women in a kind of a in a world where it’s just inundated with information. Yeah. They just want some real talk

Kate Beere:
Yeah. Action. That’s what’s worked for you and what hasn’t and learning and and trying. So just do talk to your doctor before you start anything.

Wendy Dodds:
That’s our disclaimer.

Kate Beere:
That’s our full we’re now at the disclaimer point in the podcast. It’s feeling pretty good. Okay. To get things started, why don’t we talk about because we we brainstorm ideas, obviously, before we’re gonna come on Yeah. And what we’re gonna talk about. And so this is a topic, just women’s health in general. It’s not it’s starting to gain traction, but it hasn’t always been really comfortable to talk about. So why do we

Wendy Dodds:
think that is? Yeah. If we think about why this is so hush-hush, and to your point, like, why we don’t talk about, I think one of the biggest things is embarrassment, and it’s often seen as one of the biggest signs of aging. Right. And and many of these changes start happening in our forties and our fifties, sometimes even before that. I’ll talk about that later.

Kate Beere:
Yeah.

Wendy Dodds:
But that is usually when we’re in the prime of our careers, raising families, you know, still finding ourselves along that journey. And then all of a sudden, we’re hit with, holy shit. Now I feel old. Now I’m aging. And it and it does. It happens so fast. It’s almost like you’re blindsided by Yep. What the hell is going on.

Wendy Dodds:
One minute, you’re fine. The next minute, you’re sweating your tits off in bed at 2 o’clock in the morning, or at least I am. We just changed our duvet last week because I’m like, I can’t I can’t sleep like this. Yeah. Your hormones are wild. You don’t know what’s wrong, and and your belly makes you feel like you’re 6 months pregnant. What do you I hear it all the time from women. Yeah.

Wendy Dodds:
What do you mean? Yeah. Except you. You look great.

Kate Beere:
Oh, yeah. Right?

Wendy Dodds:
Notice we’re wearing black today.

Kate Beere:
Oh my. And the table’s covered here. I feel great. Here.

Wendy Dodds:
But, yeah, I think I think that’s probably one of the biggest reasons why it’s so taboo. It’s embarrassing, and it’s and you feel like, well, I’m aging. I don’t wanna

Kate Beere:
I don’t wanna age. I I completely agree. And I think for women, there’s so much pressure around aging in in a way where it’s, you know, you’re supposed to look flawless. You’re not supposed to look like you’re aging, but, you know, like, the outside has to always look a certain

Wendy Dodds:
way. Barbie movie.

Kate Beere:
Well, it is the Barbie movie, and it’s like, the truth is we’re aging, and there’s things that happen to us physically as we age. Yep. And it’s and it’s, I think, when we’re gonna talk about this, but the mental component of that is is really challenging

Wendy Dodds:
Very true. To a

Kate Beere:
lot of women.

Wendy Dodds:
Yeah. Yeah.

Kate Beere:
I think so, one other thing to add around, like, why things are shifting and the conversations are shifting, I think we can all, like, align on, you know, very male heavy industry was, you know, medical field. I can’t say the medical professional word today if I try.

Wendy Dodds:
Makes sense. It’s really not.

Kate Beere:
But the medical field has been predominantly, men. Right? And so I think with that shift and starting to see a lot more female doctors come to the table, you know, we’re starting to see more, like, better access to actual care for women that’s tailored for women’s needs Right. Because women’s hormonal health is very different than men’s. Yep. And that’s just it’s it’s not a good or bad thing. It’s just a fact.

Wendy Dodds:
It’s a fact.

Kate Beere:
But now we’re actually getting access to more, and we’re we’re speaking up more and which I think is amazing. But I think, traditionally, we just, you know, there’s been a lot of men who don’t understand Right. What women are going through, or we’ve been told to just well, it is what it is.

Wendy Dodds:
It is, and this is part of life, and just learn how to deal with it.

Kate Beere:
Which is the most horrible

Wendy Dodds:
Right.

Kate Beere:
Thing that you can say.

Wendy Dodds:
Right.

Kate Beere:
So why don’t we start by sharing? Because we we kinda talked a lot that we’re gonna share, but why don’t we talk a little bit about like, what has been your journey with? I know we we don’t have, like, 4 hours because I think it would take 4 hours for each of us to even delve into our journey, but maybe some highlights around some of your challenges along the way.

Wendy Dodds:
Yeah. So so I will say hormonal now I’ll start off by saying I’ve had a hysterectomy.

Kate Beere:
Yep.

Wendy Dodds:
But it was a partial hysterectomy. So I still have my ovaries. Yeah. And that was a decision that they made when I went through my hysterectomy. Yeah. However, the steps leading up to actually was 30 years ago, 20 years ago, because you have to it’s almost like you have to go through all of these check boxes in order to be a qualified candidate to have your uterus removed. I’m not having any more kids. I don’t need that in my oven anymore.

Wendy Dodds:
So, you know, like, let’s just take it out,

Kate Beere:
but it’s not.

Wendy Dodds:
It’s very so it seems like when I hit my forties Yeah. Right when I hit my forties, everything from now, I also have a male doctor. Right? And I will say, I preferred I had a female doctor before, and I found my female doctor was very, like, no. Like, because she was a female, she almost, like, just kind of assumed what I was feeling when just because she was a female. Whereas my male doctor, again, yes, a male dominant industry, but still even with him, I had to go through all of these steps, but I find that everybody has to do that. So as soon as I hit forties, it was, okay. So let’s start off with, trying an IUD to just help regulate Yeah. The cycle, all of that kind of stuff.

Wendy Dodds:
And then it was the actual process of getting referred to a gynecologist. Which is the process. Yeah. Which is a very long process in the wait list and all of that kind of stuff. Yeah. And even though an IUD for so many women becomes very helpful Very. For me Yep. It was awful.

Wendy Dodds:
And so I’m, like, one of the very few in a small percentage where the IUD literally took, like, an hour and a half to get in. They needed 4 doctors to get it in. It was awful. Yeah. And and the table looked like a crime scene when they were done. And then I ended up losing the IUD, like, 6 months later. So, clearly, my body wasn’t responding to it. So everything from the IUD, then moving into like hemorrhaging, being hospitalized, then finally getting a referral to a gynecologist, which happened to be a fluke.

Wendy Dodds:
And I won’t get into that story, but it just happened to be a fluke from somebody that I knew who happened to see me in the hospital the day I was in the hospital hemorrhaging. That’s nice. You’re in a waiting room, bleeding everywhere. And, yeah, so ended up getting that, but then moving through those steps of going through an ablation and then finally hysterectomy. But that was like a 3 year journey. And so all of that and then those hormonal changes on top of it in terms of the mood swings, the joint pain, the emotional stuff. So, yeah, quite a process. Quite a process.

Kate Beere:
K. That’s a lot. I have it’s interesting because I have a female doctor, and my it it’s interesting to hear your take on that because my female doctor is, like, a lot of, like, just deal with it. And I don’t know if it’s because she’s a female or not. She’s that’s very much her personality. And when I was, you know, I would say going through my pregnancies, it took the 3rd one to even get diagnosed with postpartum where I had them with all 3. Right? There’s just like, there’s this I don’t know what it is, but there’s this mental thing where women are just supposed to not need help, and then we’re just supposed to buck up and deal with it and take it on. People know.

Kate Beere:
Right? And I know for me in, like, perimenopause, just I’m trying to get a referral to see a gynecologist who specializes. There’s one in Ottawa that every woman goes to. It’s a bit like the vasectomy doctor that every guy goes to in Ottawa, and she’s supposed to be phenomenal. The wait list is at least 10 months to a year to get in. I can’t even get a referral for my doctor Wow. To get in because she for her, she has a checklist that she goes through. Yep. Right? So go go

Wendy Dodds:
do qualify.

Kate Beere:
Right. Do you qualify for I don’t I I have a vagina. I qualify for a gynecologist. Like, period. That’s where it should end. Right? Like, we should have access to that. I have well, I do. So, technically, I’m qualified.

Kate Beere:
That should be the only question on that, LeChuck. But I she won’t refer me, and so she does blood work, but we all know to see where your hormones are. Yep. But the blood work, depending on where you are in your cycle, shows different results. So it’s not an accurate assessment of whether I’m perimenopausal or not. Meanwhile, I have every other symptom. Right? The night sweats, the hot flashes, the not sleeping, the brain fog, the fatigue, the waking, like, everything that you can see but still can’t get in. Not enough.

Kate Beere:
No. And then it’s like, let’s try these things, which are oh, you can go on an antidepressant. Apparently, antidepressant is the cure for everything. Right.

Wendy Dodds:
Here. Let me help you spread

Kate Beere:
your prescription. Give you a pill for this. Let me give you this. And I like, for me, I always like to take a more natural approach to my health. I don’t wanna be taking, you know, every drug under the sun constantly from a pharmaceutical perspective. I I would like to know that there’s better options out there. And for me, I just haven’t had a great experience with my family doctor who I who I actually love. But for this particular topic, I felt pretty, like, isolated and almost a bit like you’re almost a bit embarrassed that you’re even asking.

Wendy Dodds:
Right. Because then you think like, well, maybe it’s just me or maybe I’m over exaggerating or maybe I just need to calm down and and just kinda but interesting that you share your story though because so many women

Kate Beere:
So many women.

Wendy Dodds:
Feel the same way about their family doctors. Yeah. And and family doctors are wonderful, And and we’re very lucky here in Canada that we have them, even though there’s a shortage, but that’s a whole other topic. We’re not talking about that. But I don’t think and, again, this is my personal opinion. I don’t think they have a lot of training in that particular field. Or and that’s why we need specialists. We need more specialists to be able to deal specifically with that.

Wendy Dodds:
So to feel like you’re not heard and to just kinda go in and be like, here’s what I’m feeling. Okay. Great. Here, let’s let’s push on antidepressant meds, or let’s try you on this, try you on that. It’s just not a solution for so many people because we don’t feel heard. We don’t feel listened to. We don’t and I know for many people, they start to feel like, well, maybe it’s just me.

Kate Beere:
Well, you you start to think you’re a bit Crazy? A bit crazy. Yep. I like, I’m grateful. I have a great group of of women, I will say, and we talk about all kinds of stuff, but menopause has taken over our dinners lately.

Wendy Dodds:
Yeah.

Kate Beere:
It’s it’s what we talk about. It’s all our ailments, and menopause is part of that. What are you trying? What are you trying? That’s how I’ve learned. I don’t feel to your point that I’m learning from the medical system. I feel like I’m doing research on my own. I’m talking to other women, and and that to me, I think, is a is a is a fail of our system because we should have access to care.

Wendy Dodds:
Absolutely. Because

Kate Beere:
I we if you’re you have a vagina, you’re allowed to go. Yeah. I’m gonna keep saying it.

Wendy Dodds:
Right. It’s just

Kate Beere:
I I want people to feel comfortable using words around our health and female health. Yep. Agreed. Okay. What was one piece of advice or insight that you wish you had maybe gotten earlier, right, in that premenopause, menopausal let’s talk about that specifically.

Wendy Dodds:
Yeah. So I think we speak a lot about the physical aspects of it, which I 100% agree Yeah. Is is huge in forefront. I wish that I knew where to go for support. Yeah. And and recognizing that even though we feel we don’t get a lot of support from our medical system Yeah. Knowing what other options were out there for me, even if I had to do all of my own research, especially on the mental aspect of it, when you feel like, okay, I have these physical things, but there’s some days mentally where I just can’t explain what is wrong or why I feel so different. So we talk about the hot flashes, the Yeah.

Wendy Dodds:
Weight gain, the, you know, all, you know, all all of the physical stuff that we feel, but but then taking a toll on the mental aspect of it as well.

Kate Beere:
Yeah. I mean and the mental part is it’s really you know, what I found really difficult in that journey is just like, what I used to be able to plow through. Right? Like, I’m when I’m when I’m sick, I’m like, okay. I got this, and I’m gonna I’m gonna it’s what I do. I hustle through everything. I power through. I bug up. I get on with it.

Kate Beere:
Menopause, I have not been able to do that with. The level of and because it’s long. It is not like you don’t have menopause for 6 weeks. Like, it’s years. And so the toll it starts to take Yeah. Is like I my mental fog some days, I’m like, holy like, I’m

Wendy Dodds:
It’s exhausting.

Kate Beere:
It is because I consider myself smart and quick, and there are days where I’m like, wow. Like, you’re I’m staring at my child, and I’m like, I know I need to know your name, and I I can’t access it. Yeah. And, like, I say that jokingly, but that is what happens where I find myself, it’s like I’m pregnant. I’m putting the milk in the cupboard and the cereal in the fridge. Like Yep. Just very, very like, that brain fog. And I just can’t fight through it and the fatigue.

Kate Beere:
So and that was the other piece. So then what that starts to do over years is your that self worth piece and that anxiety and depression where it’s just like, why can’t I do this? What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I lose the belly weight that I used to be able to you know, if I ate right and exercise, I could lose? Why is my skin sagging? Why is my why are there so many wrinkles happening? Why do I feel like crap? Why can’t I fix it? What is wrong with me that I can’t power

Wendy Dodds:
through this? I love that you mentioned self worth, though, because it it slowly chips away.

Kate Beere:
It does.

Wendy Dodds:
And I feel so I do feel like more women are talking about it. I feel like we still need to continue doing a good job at talking about it because I feel like even when you fall into the, overperforming high achiever category, which many women do, having that chip away at your self worth and your self confidence is one of the worst feelings to to go through. Because, yes, we talk about it, but there’s still a lot that don’t talk about it. And then in the in the world of social media where you see everybody’s supposedly has all their shit together, and you you know, for me, I can’t seem to remember what exit I get off on the highway to come home and just, like, sail right by it. And I’m just like, what is wrong with me?

Kate Beere:
Well and it’s and I wish for getting simple things. Oh, like small thing. Like like when I talk about putting the milk in the cupboard, I’m just I’m not as as on it. And I think I agree that we’re talking about it more. I wish what I had learned earlier was what it was. So, like, like, we talked about yeah. Okay. I know menopause like, in my thirties, I know what menopause is.

Kate Beere:
I understand it as a as a concept. I don’t actually understand what it means Nope. Physically or mentally. It reminded me a lot of, like, like, before you get pregnant, what people talk about, like, what pregnancy feels like and looks like is not what pregnancy is. Pregnancy is all kinds of other stuff that no one tells you about, especially delivery and

Wendy Dodds:
recovery and what it could be and the trauma to

Kate Beere:
your body. And recovery and what it could be and the trauma to your body, the hormonal follow that happens or pre for you. Right? Like, nobody talks about it. We all talk about, oh, you have a baby, no pain. And I’m like, well, that wasn’t my experience. Right? And so I wish we almost did that with menopause. Like, I wish people would have told me outside of the, like, yeah, you’re in hot sweats or what. I wish we talk more about the truth and how long it can potentially last for a lot of women.

Kate Beere:
Yes. I wish I’d just early it starts. Oh my god.

Wendy Dodds:
None of this starts. It starts in your 50. Totally. Yeah. It can, but it can also start when you’re in your late thirties

Kate Beere:
Why do

Wendy Dodds:
you think in your forties.

Kate Beere:
Yeah. Like Which

Wendy Dodds:
I think is a huge myth.

Kate Beere:
It’s and I think there’s a lot of myths. And that one in particular, like, my doctor said, oh, she went off age when I started feeling perimenopausal, which started for me years ago, and I’m 24. Of course. But I

Wendy Dodds:
was gonna say 25. Yeah. I’m glad you corrected that.

Kate Beere:
So I am 48. But when mine started, she’s like, oh, it’s a bit early. And I’m thinking in my head, for once, can the medical system not all box us into the same thing? Because for some women, it can happen as early as their thirties. It’s not as common. For some women, it can happen late into their fifties. Not as common, but it does happen. Totally. So you think about that.

Kate Beere:
That’s like 25 year spectrum of when women could potentially be starting menopause. And we don’t everyone thinks, oh, it just happens, like, at a certain time.

Wendy Dodds:
Everybody’s getting boxed in using a square peg trying to jam it into a

Kate Beere:
ventricle. Yes. I think that’s a big one. What are some other myths in your experience?

Wendy Dodds:
So menopause symptoms don’t exist. You know? Like, I think we touched a little bit on this. Just, oh, you’re having a bad day. You’re having an off day. Try to get more sleep. Yeah. Fuck off. I’m sleeping.

Wendy Dodds:
I’m sleeping a lot, and that’s that’s my problem. Like, I’m Yeah. I’m sleeping, and I’m still feeling fatigued, or I’m still feeling like, oh, you know, try, you know, eating this or that or whatever. I’m trying to think of an example, but that’ll, like, help your brain foggy.

Kate Beere:
Totally.

Wendy Dodds:
Yeah. I am. I’m eating all the brain foggy things, and and things are still foggy. Wow. Damn vagina.

Kate Beere:
We’re just gonna keep we’re gonna keep saying, I’m gonna tell a story now. It’s totally Steve.

Wendy Dodds:
He’s smiling. Yeah.

Kate Beere:
Steve, you there? Hey. I’m gonna tell a story that Steve might wanna not hear, but I think, like, that’s the whole point of us talking about this because I think it’s relevant as we just keep saying vagina and how important it is to keep saying the word. But I was out at a networking, event, and it was for women in business. So there’s a bunch of women sitting around the table. I can’t remember how this topic came up, but we’re in, like, a big coffee. It was a big coffee place, and we started talking about how ridiculous it is that we don’t talk about menstruation and how, like, men in particular are super uncomfortable. Like, if I just walk into the room, like, oh, yeah. I’m on my period.

Kate Beere:
Everyone in the room is like, ugh. Like, even women. Right? Like, we don’t need to know that. Like, that’s Yep. It’s like a dirty topic that we’re not supposed to talk about. And this one woman around the table, she’s like, yeah. I mean, reality is, like, there’s at least 12 women in this room who are openly bleeding, and I lost we all lost so hard, and we’re, like, openly bleeding. She’s like, well, that’s what’s happening.

Kate Beere:
And I’m like, I’d never thought about it like that. And it’s so true. And women just, like, sit or and we’re like, people are probably uncomfortable thinking they need to change a tampon or a pad. Were are they leaking? But they’re still engaging in a conversation and putting on this brave face of, like, I’m fine. I’m fine. I’m fine. And it got me thinking that if there were 12 men in that room openly bleeding, it would be a very different conversation Yep. In society 100%.

Kate Beere:
In the medical community. 100%. But that’s what women do. We just put on that brave face. Yeah. But I love

Wendy Dodds:
that you shared that story because both of us have daughters.

Kate Beere:
Yeah.

Wendy Dodds:
And being able to give our daughters the tools and have those open conversations and discussions around everything that we have felt and gone through

Kate Beere:
Yeah.

Wendy Dodds:
And that they are now as well Yeah. I think is super, super important.

Kate Beere:
And I I think normalizing important. That’s a long time. Yep. And I think young girls are so embarrassed about their period, and it’s because we we shame girls. We shame women in a in maybe not always consciously, and I think I probably done it too, subconsciously sometimes. Right? But it’s how do we stop it being feeling like such a dirty conversation when it’s literally part of 50% of the population’s journey

Wendy Dodds:
Yep. Every month. 100%. 100%. And and for one of my daughters who deals with horrible periods every month with, you know, to the point where she can’t go to school sometimes, horrible cramping, flow so heavy that, you know, almost to the point where she’s like, what’s wrong with me? Yeah. And and putting that spin on there’s nothing wrong with you. This and and also being conscious of my language around this is just the way it is, but being able to help her deal and cope, especially when you are still in school or you are, you know, around a bunch of people. Yeah.

Wendy Dodds:
And your first thought, you know, again, you know, am I leaking? Am I, like It’s well, and I’m

Kate Beere:
awful to deal with. I’m I and this is real women, real talk. Like, I know women who, like, power through, like, a supersized tampon in 10 minutes. Yeah. Like and they’re changing their tampon, you know, 8 times in an hour. Like, no, I don’t wanna be in public, and no, I don’t wanna be on a bus, and, no, I don’t wanna be somewhere where there’s potential that and there’s nothing you can do about it. Right.

Wendy Dodds:
And, no, I don’t wanna be in bed for the next 7 days because I wanna be able to live my life. So what

Kate Beere:
do I do? Totally. Yep. Okay. We talked a little bit about mental and emotional health. Maybe let’s talk a little bit more on, you know, what steps can we kinda take around that? Because there’s a lot. Right? We talk about isolation, anxiety, depression.

Wendy Dodds:
Yeah. I think, and we’ve kinda touched on this, but finding so being the catalyst of change and being the person in your circle Yeah. Who is open and willing to talk about, because a lot of times, in anything, we just wait for somebody to go first.

Kate Beere:
Sure.

Wendy Dodds:
Yeah. So being the person in your circle of friends or in your group or in your network or whatever, that starts to facilitate more of those conversations, more of that feeling of how can we support each other. Putting that spin, I was gonna say spin of fun. There’s nothing fun about this at all. No. But putting that spin on knowing that you’ve got that place, like, even when you mentioned when you were at that networking event where, you know, you can laugh even though there’s nothing funny about it, but you can you know that you’re supported by a circle that is going through the same thing as you. And a lot of times, that embarrassment and not wanting to talk about stuff like that and just, oh, you know, I’m just gonna deal with it, Guaranteed, there’s so many other people thinking it, just nobody wants to speak up. So I think it’s about really being able find that community, and there’s lots of communities out there.

Kate Beere:
Yeah. There

Wendy Dodds:
are. If you look, and knowing kind of where we are in our medical system, I’m a firm believer in taking responsibility for not just the choices you make, but the actions that you want and the results that you want. So, yeah, it’s it’s gonna be about finding that right support and that right network and that right community. And maybe it’s not like people in your life right now, but maybe it’s other groups, other circles. And I think when we said earlier, we’re doing a better job at creating more awareness around it, we are. It’s still a long way to go, but I think that there are some great tools and resources out there. But I think it’s about really finding that community and that network where you can share. Yeah.

Kate Beere:
Yeah. And I agree with you. I think, like, we have to take control of our own health, and that’s everything. Yes. Every avenue. I I hear stories all the time, and I’m I’m blown away by what I hear. So unless you’re an advocate for your own health, and that’s just that’s our reality.

Wendy Dodds:
Reality.

Kate Beere:
It is what we have. And so you have to find your best way through it, but you just you can’t blindly just trust everything your doctor tells you either. Like, I do believe there’s 2. Do your research, find what works for you. We’re not all the same. What works for you might not work for me, right, which might work for someone else. So it’s figuring out what works. Yep.

Kate Beere:
So on Yeah. Be comfortable

Wendy Dodds:
with that too. Well, yeah,

Kate Beere:
it’d be totally like, there’s no shame Yeah. In asking your doctor for what you want. I think, like, we have a bit of a mindset around going in that they know everything, and they don’t know try something, and your doctor might never have heard of it. And they they actually can’t tell you to take it because that’s irresponsible of of them. Right. So it’s finding what works for you. Okay, so what works for you?

Wendy Dodds:
Well, I’ll tell you, a lighter duvet.

Kate Beere:
We get like, the duvet, I can’t explain to you.

Wendy Dodds:
Like paper thin. The duvet. I just

Kate Beere:
woke up the stairs, and I was like, the duvet is like this thin.

Wendy Dodds:
I’ll because I’m too hot with anything else.

Kate Beere:
I’ll give you a tip. I got one. It’s like a it’s like a hot cold one, so it actually helps regulate because I I would be like like, I would be drenched from head to toe. Like, there’s nothing nothing good happening, and I will, like, flail it off. And then I’m, like, icy cold, so I’m flailing it back on, and then but I found one that’s been better, but there’s no perfect duvet

Wendy Dodds:
when you’re in that. To I mean, you need to get that. We’ll add

Kate Beere:
that in the show notes. This is the the great demon.

Wendy Dodds:
The hot flash.

Kate Beere:
The great demon.

Wendy Dodds:
The hot flash demon. It matters. Okay. So so what’s working for me? So I will say a lot of this is trial and error. Yeah. Now funny enough, a lot of people will think, because because I was very open about my hysterectomy journey, because I wanted to bring awareness to kinda everything that happened and let up before that, and just how I had to advocate to and not that I was like, this is what I need, give it to me. Like, I’m not an expert either. And so, of course, I trust my doctor, but also my gynecologist as they kinda went through.

Wendy Dodds:
And and let’s let’s be real, having a hysterectomy is major surgery.

Kate Beere:
Major surgery.

Wendy Dodds:
Major surgery. However, so so I’ve been very open about sharing that, but I still experience all of the menopausal symptoms because I still have my ovaries. It wasn’t a, one shot deal. Just take out all the equipment. Like, that’s what they decided to keep in because she didn’t wanna throw me into menopause right away.

Kate Beere:
Yep. Thanks. Yeah. I have friends in that same boat, by the way.

Wendy Dodds:
Yep. But I will say so a few tips. So, and and I love that you said, and I’ll preface it again, it’s not a one size fits all. It really is about trial and error, Giving your body time to adjust to new changes that you’re making, new things that you’re incorporating. So for me, really increasing my protein Yeah. Has helped and more plant based foods. Yeah. So it doesn’t mean I’m following a completely plant based diet Yep.

Wendy Dodds:
But I am being more intentional with adding in more plant based foods into my day to day. It’s awesome. Part of that requires planning. Part of that requires trying new things. Yep. So I have found that that has helped. It’s not perfect, but it’s helped. I’m just gonna put it out there.

Wendy Dodds:
I sleep naked now. Yeah. Naked sleeping because I’m too fucking hot.

Kate Beere:
I always I I like it’s not an overshare. I sleep naked. I have to. Yes. We’re the naked sleepers. It’s a thing. But it It is a thing. It helps because what happens is when you have a hot just to explain it, when you for the women who have them, you you know what this is like.

Kate Beere:
But when you are in pajamas or a T shirt or whatever and you you literally soak through it

Wendy Dodds:
Yep.

Kate Beere:
And then it’s cold and it’s wet and it doesn’t dry. And then you toss and turn all night, and you’re in this, like it’s just it’s a horrible experience.

Wendy Dodds:
It is horrible. And then you wonder why you’re tired when you wake up. Well, that’s it. You haven’t slept. Yeah. So sleep naked. I don’t wanna sleep naked. Yeah.

Wendy Dodds:
You do. Once you sleep naked, you’re never gonna go back. Never go back. Exactly. Limiting my caffeine. So I’m not a coffee drinker, but I’m a tea drinker. Yeah. And I love my tea.

Wendy Dodds:
And I can easily go through, like, 4 or 5 teas a day. Yeah. I’ve had to be really intentional Yep. With limiting my caffeine. Interesting. Okay. So 1 or 2, 2 max, but I absolutely notice if I have more than that, I do notice the physical effects. Interesting.

Wendy Dodds:
If I if I’m consuming too much. Yep. I also deal with a lot of inflammation. So funny enough, so joint pain and eyesight for me, and these are probably 2 things that people don’t think about with menopause. Again, not a doctor, sharing my own experiences. Joint pain and inflammation as well as inflammation and visceral fat in the stomach area Yep. Has been very predominant over the past several years. Yeah.

Wendy Dodds:
So finding more natural ways to kinda help with that. So I do, regular cellular cleansing

Kate Beere:
Yeah.

Wendy Dodds:
Once a week or once every, 2 weeks Yeah. To, help with that inflammation, to reduce that inflammation and the, acidity Yeah. In the body. Even if you’re not eating sorry. Even if you’re eating really well, your body will still naturally become inflamed. It’s just part of the environment that we live in. Yes. Your liver cleanses itself, but it doesn’t cleanse itself the way it did 20, 30 years ago.

Wendy Dodds:
Totally. You got so much other stuff in the environment. So I do that. I find it helps with joints, again, not perfect, but doing it regularly has helped, as well as visceral fat. Yep. And then for my joints as well, also increasing my collagen. So type 2 collagen, which is for your joints, your ligaments. So, I find that I’ve dealt with a lot of knee pain, just very creaky bones, just feeling like and and it was it almost didn’t feel like it was gradual.

Wendy Dodds:
It almost felt like one morning I just woke up and was like, holy shit. Like, I’m aching everywhere. What the hell is wrong with me? I’m only you know, this was a couple years ago. Yep. And I’m like, now I’m like, I’m almost 47, and I’m like, wow.

Kate Beere:
Your hormones levels completely shift, so that makes sense.

Wendy Dodds:
Yep. Vitamins, I mean, you can do tons of research on vitamins, but b vitamins for me, so b 6, I find that helps with the serotonin boost. Yeah. Yeah. The stress. Yep. And then vitamin d. I’ve been really intentional.

Wendy Dodds:
And vitamin d is new for me. I probably started it about 6 months ago, but just being able to help with that deboost because as we get older, many of us have a d deficiency.

Kate Beere:
Yeah. I have a I have one girlfriend who has a massive d deficiency, and she gets shots done. And Yeah. Yeah. Because it’s so low. Okay. Those are all great. Yeah.

Wendy Dodds:
Yeah.

Kate Beere:
I do Just a few of them, I guess. Yeah. I do some similar, so vitamin d for sure. Yeah. I do B12 because I track with low B12. Mhmm. I do vitamin C. I’m not a big fruit.

Kate Beere:
I don’t get a lot of vitamin C in my diet, so that’s why I take that. And then I take hyaluronic acid, which is just like it’s oral, so it does help with your skin. Yes. And my collagen, I take as well daily for, also for skin, but for joints. So and I’ve noticed a huge difference with the collagen. It takes a while. Like, it it took it took me over 3 months. That’s how long it took me, and then I noticed if I don’t take it, I notice it.

Kate Beere:
So Yes. For me, that was a a game changer.

Wendy Dodds:
Well, when your body stops producing collagen Yeah. Typically after you’re 30. And I love that you mentioned that it does take time because with any of these, right, it’s not, I take it for a week, I don’t feel any different. It absolutely does take time.

Kate Beere:
There’s no quick fixes. I also take magnesium at night. So magnesium for me has been a game changer for sleep and night sweats. So I, without fault, will take my magnesium. If I don’t take it for a couple of nights, I really notice a big difference. So for me, it keeps me asleep longer. I’m not waking up as much. Mhmm.

Kate Beere:
Still waking up. Yeah. But my hot sweats at night have decreased immensely with magnesium. And there’s different types of magnesium, so do your research and make sure you get the right one just for anyone out there.

Wendy Dodds:
Yeah. Which one do you take? It’s bis

Kate Beere:
I didn’t know

Wendy Dodds:
there was difference. Bis. Bis. Bis. Bis.

Kate Beere:
Bis. Bis. Bisglycinate is the one I’m taking.

Wendy Dodds:
Maybe we’ll link it in the show notes.

Kate Beere:
Yeah, I’m happy to, but there’s different types that do different things or affect whatever. I’m so not a medical person, as you can tell. So for me, that has helped immensely. I think I take another supplement too. I can’t remember what it’s called. I can link it, which is for menopause, which just helps kinda like, has really helped stabilize. It helps with mood. It helps with just overall feeling better.

Kate Beere:
Like, I don’t know how else to say that. And the other thing I’ve worked really hard on is just trying mentally Yeah. To not hate on myself and my body so much. And that’s been the hardest part.

Wendy Dodds:
And that’s Self love piece is always the hardest part.

Kate Beere:
Yeah. It’s like, and then we just did an episode, I think, where we talked about this, like looking at yourself in the mirror naked and appreciating your body for what it’s given you, right? And so that has been a big part of it and understanding that jeez, I almost lost the screen. It would have been devastating. Catastrophic. Catastrophic to lose my notes. I’m I’m just teasing. But to really, like, embrace your

Wendy Dodds:
Total life.

Kate Beere:
Your what’s happening and and find a way mentally to embrace it. I’m gonna fight aging. Like, I’m not one to sit here and say, like, I I love everything I see, but I think it’s important to not overly criticize or, you know, you’re working out, or you need to eat better, you need to work out more. Like, you shouldn’t look like like all of that language, being really mindful of it and trying to soften Yeah. Is maybe the best way

Wendy Dodds:
to do it. And our mind listens to everything we tell itself. I have such a hang up over the word aging.

Kate Beere:
Yeah.

Wendy Dodds:
Because you hear products everywhere, especially in the network marketing space, antiaging this, antiaging that. Well, aging is gonna happen. The antiword is such a bad word. Yeah. So learning how to embrace that and using, to your point, softer language that embraces where you are right now Yeah. It’s no different than and I hear it from women all the time in the fitness space. I’m hanging on to my size 4 jean shorts because one summer, I’m gonna fit into that bucket. Get rid of them.

Wendy Dodds:
Embrace where you are right now. Love yourself where you’re at. We spend so much time focusing on where we should be, versus where we are right now.

Kate Beere:
I don’t know. If we fast forward and we’re, you know, we’re all talking about this, menopause, hormonal health, the topics, vaginas, vaginas more openly. What are you hoping you’re hearing more of?

Wendy Dodds:
I wanna hear more people talk. Yeah. Period. I wanna hear more people talk about the good, bad, and the ugly. Yeah. I wanna feel like when my daughter gets to be my age, that there’s a society and a world where it is just as common as talking about the weather every day. And it’s just something that happens. I feel like we need to recognize that our bodies have immense healing capabilities.

Wendy Dodds:
Mhmm. But the only way to heal is if is if our mind is in the right place Yeah. To be able to embrace that. Feeding it the right tools and the right ingredients, finding the right people. And I really think it’s about being selfish enough to go after what you deserve. You know, we talk a lot about go after what you want, and a lot of times we think about motherhood and careers. Well, your body is just as important. So, you know, not settling for the, it is the way it is, and that’s just how it is.

Wendy Dodds:
No. It’s not just how it is. Like, yes, things are gonna happen, but I deserve to have a good quality of life. I don’t wanna feel like this for the next 10 or 20 years. No. No. It doesn’t mean that that’s easy to do. It takes a lot of micro tweaks, and I would just kind of go back to the when we were talking about vitamins and stuff like that.

Wendy Dodds:
I would suggest, again, not a medical professional, but I wouldn’t incorporate everything that you and I mentioned all at once.

Kate Beere:
No. Start with Right. Start with one thing.

Wendy Dodds:
Yeah. 1 or 2 things. Yeah. Kinda see how that works, and then slowly start to build because it’s easy to be like, oh, I I’m gonna try this. I should try this. I all of these suggestions are great. I’m gonna try everything at once. So I think it’s really about those micro tweaks.

Wendy Dodds:
Yep. And I will also talk from a male perspective. Yeah. I would love and and, you know, progressing in the future and and even right now, I would love to tell men, don’t hit pause. Right? Just because we’re in menopause, perimen whatever. You know, that word is just very I don’t wanna talk about it. Yeah. Don’t hit pause because this is a life change that affects them as well.

Wendy Dodds:
Sure. Especially from a relationship perspective. Sometimes Rob doesn’t even know what to do with me. And as a man Yeah. He wants to fix me. He wants to fix everything. And that’s just you know? And and some of the language he uses all from loving is, tell me what I can do to help. I don’t know what to do because I don’t even know what to do for myself.

Wendy Dodds:
Right. And he wants to fix me because he loves me, but I get frustrated because I complain about how I’m feeling, but I sometimes don’t know how to fix myself. So, you know, I think anxiety and mood, but also being really vulnerable and having those conversations. And it’s okay to be like, I don’t know what I need right now, but you know what? Just having you listen to me Yeah.

Kate Beere:
Is is often And love my vagina. That we’re not that’s a different show, Wendy. That’s a totally different show.

Wendy Dodds:
We’re showing intimacy in a couple of way okay.

Kate Beere:
That’s not this show.

Wendy Dodds:
But just being able to have that open dialogue, all joking aside. Right? They’re just loving me for where I am now.

Kate Beere:
And the open conversation, I think for me, what I got really present to this year is bold lip where I work, you know, 4 days out of the week. It’s all women. And so what’s been an amazing experience is to you know, someone called in sick. Oh, are they okay? And, yeah, she she got her period today, and she’s like, it’s she’s really cramping and not feeling well. And we’re all like, oh, that’s horrible. I hope she feels better. And I remember just being like,

Wendy Dodds:
woah. Yeah.

Kate Beere:
Like, where am I? What an amazing Ugh. Right? How many times have, you know, women felt like it’s not a good enough reason to not go to work? And I remember being, like, bellowed over in so much pain. I haven’t slept. I have back pain. I have cramps. I my migraine is off the charts. I am you just feel horrible, yet that’s not a reason to not go into work, and it’s not supported. So I think for me in the future, I just love to have a space where women are allowed to say, I’m not feeling well today.

Kate Beere:
And if someone asks, they’re allowed to say, I have my period, and and I’m just really crampy. And to have no one in that room have a reaction of, oh, oh, oh, or, well, it’s not a good enough reason. Right. You should right.

Wendy Dodds:
And so for me, coming from an HR space Yeah. You still would drive me crazy when you only have so many sick days. You only have so many sick days you can well, it’s not up to you to determine now, of course, You know? If you’re a good employee, you know that they’re gonna make up the time. Like, it’s not the end of the world. Right. And also being able to support our our daughters. You know? If they’re not feeling well and they can’t come to school, and my kid is lying with her legs up against the wall like I used to when I was 14 years old because you feel like there’s knives in your stomach Totally. I need to explain to your teacher.

Wendy Dodds:
You shouldn’t need to explain to your teacher, you know, or justify why you’re not feeling well. Long as you’re responsible and you’re, you know, you’re doing your work, your homework, or whatever. The guilt factor is huge. It’s And and that’s why so many people just,

Kate Beere:
I guess they’ll just go in. And just remind

Wendy Dodds:
you that

Kate Beere:
it happens every month for women. So it’s and it it can last days. For some women, it’s a week long thing. So imagine, you know, 7 days out of a month, that’s how you’re feeling.

Wendy Dodds:
Yep. Or sometimes twice a month.

Kate Beere:
Well, right, depending. And early on, it can it’s all over

Wendy Dodds:
All over the map.

Kate Beere:
All over the map. So it’s it’s I think if we could just get to a place where that’s it’s more normalized, I would love that.

Wendy Dodds:
I love that about Bold Lip Yes. For you guys, though. That’s Oh, they’re What a what, what a way to just be able to set the environment for other businesses.

Kate Beere:
Yeah. And it’s just it’s a non it’s a non conversation point. It just is what it is. Okay. Before we wrap up, what are some resources? I know for me, I just wanna share with with sort of what’s worked for us. For me, doctor Jen Gunter is, like, phenomenal. I knew of her, knew some of her books, and then my girlfriend, you know, flipped us a bunch of things, and now now our chat is all about menopause. Again, however, we’re sharing resources, and this was one.

Kate Beere:
And so doctor Jen Gunter will put in the show notes, But follow her on Instagram because she’s amazing. So it’s just she’s just all about having open conversations about women’s health and specifically. So she just released her latest book called Blood, which is just it’s all around menstruation. She has a book on, menopause as well, and she has another third book, all just about empowering to have those conversations, and for men too. So to stop talking about it like it’s not happening to 50% of the population. Right?

Wendy Dodds:
I love that.

Kate Beere:
Yeah. So there’s 3 books. The other book, vagina bible. Oh, oh,

Wendy Dodds:
look at

Kate Beere:
that. On our topics. Word of the day. So I would, bar none. That would be my number one for for menopause and just even, like, menstruation.

Wendy Dodds:
Yeah. I know there’s a couple of Facebook groups that I’m in, and one of them that I really like is called menopause and so hard. And it’s a great, resource. I love the group because they they don’t deal with a lot of drama or all that kind of stuff, but it’s just really about women coming together and having that collective collaborative space to share. So we’ll stick that one in the show.

Kate Beere:
And women crave community too.

Wendy Dodds:
Yes.

Kate Beere:
Okay. We’re wrapping up here. Do you what’s, like, one thing you wanna leave our listeners today?

Wendy Dodds:
So so I would say as we when we talked about aging and we talked about just the feeling of that, don’t let age change you. I think that’s such a great message, change the way you age. Be emotionally demanding with your standards, your expectations on what you so deserve and the quality of life that you so want. That could be treatment, that could be education, that could be the support that you deserve, whatever it is that feels like you are getting what you need, and everybody’s different. And if it doesn’t make sense, and if you’re not getting answers, ask. Yeah. Right? I tell my kids this all the time. If you don’t understand something, don’t just be like, okay.

Wendy Dodds:
No. Ask. Right? Seek to be able to educate yourself, but seek to be able to get what you deserve. Find your tribe, your supporting circle, like what we, what we talked about. Because in my opinion, especially in this type of, conversation or topic, a rising tide, lifts all boats.

Kate Beere:
Oh, I love that. Yeah. I think I’m gonna say similar. Like, you’re not alone in this. And so but I would add that the responsibility is on you to advocate for your own health. So that is about you know, look at some of the resources we’ve talked about on the show. Start googling some stuff. Don’t believe everything you read on Google, but do your own research.

Kate Beere:
Talk to your family doctor. Talk to your naturopath, but start just taking control and then find community that can help support you. And I will add to that. Start shifting your mindset around menopause is a bad thing because that’s what we’ve been trained to think. Yes. So, you know, I’m always gonna lean into I get to. I I get to go through menopause. I’m not there yet with a heart.

Kate Beere:
But when you start to actually transform that thought process and find some of the positives in it so you can reframe your thinking because that mental health space, we also have to take care of.

Wendy Dodds:
I absolutely love that. The just my first thought was what you focus on, you find, what you focus on, you become. Right? And not that mental stuff fixes everything, but a lot of times, physically, how we feel is mentally how we feel. 100%. We could say we get to have vaginas.

Kate Beere:
Hey. We get to. Oh

Wendy Dodds:
my god.

Kate Beere:
That might be my new face.

Wendy Dodds:
We are so happy that you joined us for today. Don’t forget to like, share, and subscribe. Help us get the word out. Sharing is caring. I know Kate and I receive messages all the time, just with nuggets of of information and tidbits. Oh, couldn’t

Kate Beere:
get that out,

Wendy Dodds:
that come out of these podcasts. So sharing is caring. Feel free to share this with anyone in your life, that you feel would benefit from this. Don’t forget to visit our website, living richly dot me, to find out how you can join our private Facebook group. Gosh. That Facebook group is blowing up. Oh, it’s amazing. So much great information in there.

Wendy Dodds:
So much community and collaboration. Lots of exclusive only member content. And don’t forget to sign up for the 15 day vision excuse me, life vision challenge. Never say that. We need to practice the only one. 15 day life vision challenge. Yeah. Where you’re also gonna be able to link arms with like minded people on the same journey as you.

Wendy Dodds:
Until next time, thanks for joining us and continue to live your richest life.

.